I have been swatting away flies from my face, sweeping away ants on the table and wiping away dirt on my art paper. Until i realised that they were just part of the hundreds of dots in my right vision. But I do still forget sometimes. Besides these, there are other squiggly floaters around caused by the retina tear, especially one that’s smack right in the centre of my vision.
My daughter: Mum, why don’t you paint what you see in your right vision since we can’t visualise what you are describing?
And so i did:
Son: That’s so scary.
Ben: So artistic!
Son: Not when you are constantly seeing this…
Ben: True! But it’s such a nice painting. It’s abstract!
With my current slightly blurred vision in my left eye and hundreds of polka dots blurring my right, i am having a difficult time seeing, reading and, sadly, painting too. Sometimes, i wish i had been more dedicated and painted more when my sight was still good. Now, i have to take it easy and slow down.
There’s a lovely prayer i say almost every night to St Lucy (Patron Saint of eye diseases):
“St Lucy, preserve the light of my eyes so that i may see the beauties of creation, the glow of the sun, the colour of the flowers and the smile of children.”
It is a heartfelt prayer as i have been painting all the above for the past few years.
But i also do believe that:
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Rom 8:28 (NIV)
In God, i continue to trust. By Renee